Tuesday, October 27, 2009
Sunday, October 25, 2009
A Cinderella Story
I just recently became an advisor to the mia maids at church. This is a group composed of girls ages 14-15. As their advisor, I help them plan activities and teach them lessons and do stuff with them. When I got asked to do this I didn't think it would be that difficult of an adjustment for me since I had been teaching Sunday school to this same age group of boys and girls for about 4 years. Boy was I wrong. It's a completely different world and it's going to take some getting used to.
For example, the other night I got asked to chaperone a dance. I said I would be happy to without even stopping to think, "How does one chaperone a dance?" I just assumed that because I'm an adult it would come naturally. The people who asked me must not know how immature I am or they would never have asked such a thing of me. Just because I'm close to 40 does not mean that I necessarily know how a 40 year old is supposed to behave. For example, if being 40 is supposed to mean that you don't mind walking around alone all night while everyone around you is having the time of their lives then I am SO not anywhere near 40. I could have buddied up with my Bishop since he was the only other adult there that I really knew but I just didn't feel that was the way to go. My other option was to hang out with the youth from my ward. Yeah, right. LIke that's gonna happen. :) I'll tell you, I didn't feel as awkward as I would have as a youth but there was definitely awkwardness going on. I kept calling John at home just so it would look like I was doing something rather than gawking at the youth. He got tired of me calling him so I eventually started pretending to text. Can you say, "Social Anxiety Disorder"?
For a while I decided to just sit and watch the youth dance. They're kind of fun to watch because there are a lot of songs that they have synchronized dances for. I thought that was very cute and fun to watch but I would much rather have been out there dancing with them. I wonder what they would have done if I had just gotten up and joined them. Would the space around me have gotten bigger and bigger until I was out there performing a solo? I'll never know. I did see that happen to one chaperoning couple who got really excited when the song "Shout" came on by Tears for Fears. I secretly got excited about it too because that is a song from my generation but when I saw how nerdy they looked singing along so that everyone would know that they knew the words and how quickly the dance floor cleared out I was glad that I had contained myself.
After a while I decided it might be prudent to roam the halls in search of unruly children. Have you ever seen an airplane that looked like it was about to crash so you kept your eye on it and when you saw that it wasn't actually going to crash felt just a twinge of disappointment? Not because you wanted anyone to get hurt but because if it wasn't going to crash then why did you waste your time watching it? That's how I felt as I roamed the halls. Every time I looked into a room and didn't find anyone being naughty I felt just a twinge of disappointment. Because, what was I doing here if no one was going to be naughty? Not that I would know what to do if I caught anyone being naughty anyway. I only encountered two scenarios that came anywhere near disorderly conduct and I found myself encouraging it. When I found kids trying to suck the helium out of a balloon do you think I said anything about how dangerous this was or how it kills brain cells and brain cells never grow back? Of course not. Instead I offered suggestions on how to get higher doses of helium out of the balloon. I ask you, is that the mentality of a 40 year old? And when I decided to scour the parking lot for juvenile delinquents and found a boy and girl sitting together in a secluded area behind the church do you think I demanded they return to the inside at once. Nope. Instead I walked by, quiet as a mouse, not wanting to interrupt their intimate conversation.
After this I came inside and found a "click" to latch onto. The people in the group all had one very important thing in common. We were old. This attachment didn't last long because soon after, one of my youth came out into the foyer and started engaging me in conversation. As I chatted with her I watched my "peeps" disappear one at a time until I was the last "old timer" standing. The night was growing late and I could see that my mia maid would be happy to oblige me with arm wrestling matches and dinosaur drawing competitions until it was time to go home. As I was just about to add the last two legs and toenails to my stegosaurus and the clock was about to strike 10 I looked up and something magical happened. My prince charming walked in. He had dressed up in his black suit and tie and driven all the way out to Loveland so that he could have the last dance with me. I ditched my stegosaurus and my mia maid as he grabbed my hand and led me into the cultural hall. They had just started playing the last slow dance of the night and he led me out to the dance floor and swept me off my feet. (sigh). It kind of reminded me of that scene in "My Best Friend's Wedding" where she's at the reception alone and all of a sudden her friend shows up and dances with her. MAJOR kudos to John for that one. It's funny how one little gesture can turn a would be disaster into a memorable night.
The Young Women's president in our ward has a saying that she sends out with each of her emails. It reads:
Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes it is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, "I will try again tomorrow." ~Mary Anne Radmacher
To me that means "the next time you get asked to chaperone a dance, bring a date!!!" You see, all it will take is a little adjustment, and eventually I should get the hang of this.
For example, the other night I got asked to chaperone a dance. I said I would be happy to without even stopping to think, "How does one chaperone a dance?" I just assumed that because I'm an adult it would come naturally. The people who asked me must not know how immature I am or they would never have asked such a thing of me. Just because I'm close to 40 does not mean that I necessarily know how a 40 year old is supposed to behave. For example, if being 40 is supposed to mean that you don't mind walking around alone all night while everyone around you is having the time of their lives then I am SO not anywhere near 40. I could have buddied up with my Bishop since he was the only other adult there that I really knew but I just didn't feel that was the way to go. My other option was to hang out with the youth from my ward. Yeah, right. LIke that's gonna happen. :) I'll tell you, I didn't feel as awkward as I would have as a youth but there was definitely awkwardness going on. I kept calling John at home just so it would look like I was doing something rather than gawking at the youth. He got tired of me calling him so I eventually started pretending to text. Can you say, "Social Anxiety Disorder"?
For a while I decided to just sit and watch the youth dance. They're kind of fun to watch because there are a lot of songs that they have synchronized dances for. I thought that was very cute and fun to watch but I would much rather have been out there dancing with them. I wonder what they would have done if I had just gotten up and joined them. Would the space around me have gotten bigger and bigger until I was out there performing a solo? I'll never know. I did see that happen to one chaperoning couple who got really excited when the song "Shout" came on by Tears for Fears. I secretly got excited about it too because that is a song from my generation but when I saw how nerdy they looked singing along so that everyone would know that they knew the words and how quickly the dance floor cleared out I was glad that I had contained myself.
After a while I decided it might be prudent to roam the halls in search of unruly children. Have you ever seen an airplane that looked like it was about to crash so you kept your eye on it and when you saw that it wasn't actually going to crash felt just a twinge of disappointment? Not because you wanted anyone to get hurt but because if it wasn't going to crash then why did you waste your time watching it? That's how I felt as I roamed the halls. Every time I looked into a room and didn't find anyone being naughty I felt just a twinge of disappointment. Because, what was I doing here if no one was going to be naughty? Not that I would know what to do if I caught anyone being naughty anyway. I only encountered two scenarios that came anywhere near disorderly conduct and I found myself encouraging it. When I found kids trying to suck the helium out of a balloon do you think I said anything about how dangerous this was or how it kills brain cells and brain cells never grow back? Of course not. Instead I offered suggestions on how to get higher doses of helium out of the balloon. I ask you, is that the mentality of a 40 year old? And when I decided to scour the parking lot for juvenile delinquents and found a boy and girl sitting together in a secluded area behind the church do you think I demanded they return to the inside at once. Nope. Instead I walked by, quiet as a mouse, not wanting to interrupt their intimate conversation.
After this I came inside and found a "click" to latch onto. The people in the group all had one very important thing in common. We were old. This attachment didn't last long because soon after, one of my youth came out into the foyer and started engaging me in conversation. As I chatted with her I watched my "peeps" disappear one at a time until I was the last "old timer" standing. The night was growing late and I could see that my mia maid would be happy to oblige me with arm wrestling matches and dinosaur drawing competitions until it was time to go home. As I was just about to add the last two legs and toenails to my stegosaurus and the clock was about to strike 10 I looked up and something magical happened. My prince charming walked in. He had dressed up in his black suit and tie and driven all the way out to Loveland so that he could have the last dance with me. I ditched my stegosaurus and my mia maid as he grabbed my hand and led me into the cultural hall. They had just started playing the last slow dance of the night and he led me out to the dance floor and swept me off my feet. (sigh). It kind of reminded me of that scene in "My Best Friend's Wedding" where she's at the reception alone and all of a sudden her friend shows up and dances with her. MAJOR kudos to John for that one. It's funny how one little gesture can turn a would be disaster into a memorable night.
The Young Women's president in our ward has a saying that she sends out with each of her emails. It reads:
Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes it is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, "I will try again tomorrow." ~Mary Anne Radmacher
To me that means "the next time you get asked to chaperone a dance, bring a date!!!" You see, all it will take is a little adjustment, and eventually I should get the hang of this.
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