Life: Little School

Besides spending lots of time at the older kids' school I teach W's preschool 25% of the time. There are 4 kids in her preschool. I have had a lot of fun with this. I've done it with S and B as well. Never with Bry. That probably has something to do with him being the oldest. I'm a little sad because I only teach one more time before preschool ends this year. I'm going to be teaching "X for..." well, I'll think of something. (That's a letter I think we should just do away with.) I'll have her home with me for one more year after this and then she goes on to kindergarten. I usually put my kids into a professional preschool right before kindergarten but I may just do another co-op with her. It will be my last chance to do something like that.

Life:School

I haven't written in a while for 3 reasons. First, life. Second, I got sidetracked with Facebook which is fun, but definitely a time waster. Third, the last blog I attempted to write was both political and religious and I had a hard time articulating exactly what I was thinking. If I had sat down and thought about it long enough the words would have eventually come. However, it was one of those subjects that is controversial enough that I was worried I might one day have to defend my outlook. It's not that I think my opinion could be swayed by anyone but I am not a particularly skilled orator and no doubt I would lose a debate to anyone who might care enough to challenge me on it. So, I've decided to go on to other things that are a lot more meaningful to me because they have to do with blog inhibitor #1. Life.

Before I proceed, let me put the reader's mind at ease by telling you that I got off scot-free with my last scandal. (If you are in the dark about this and would like to be enlightened you can refer to my last entry.) There were no social repercussions (that I'm aware of) although it's probably ruined any future political career I might have had on the Parent Advisory Board at their school. Not because so many people know about it but because I would be afraid to run for anything with that kind of guilt weighing on my conscience. No harm done. My oratory skills would not have allowed me to run for office anyway. All this talk about school brings me back again to the main focus of this blog. Life.

I have spent many hours of my life at the kids' school lately. Whether it be for volunteering, picking up sick kids, bringing in forgotten homework or sack lunches, carpooling, watching music programs, history programs, Christmas programs or celebrations. Sometimes I feel like I'm there as much as they are. I've posted a few pictures of Bryton's Colorado State History program with him dressed as a mountain man, Brooklyn's colonial days celebration and Sydney's immigration program with her decked out in authentic Hungarian garb.

More on the subject of life in my next entry. Hopefully I won't have to wait for John to be on another camp out with the Scouts in order to get to it.

True Confessions

Today when I was waiting in a long line to drop my kids off at school I saw a window of opportunity and drove in to the school parking lot through the exit without considering the social repercussions this would bring.  

25 Things About Me

This has been stolen from Facebook but I wanted to put it on my blog.

1. Although I often go skiing with my family it absolutely terrifies me. I fear for my life the whole time I'm there.
2. I like to go on outings more than anyone. I don't care what it is. If it gets me out of the house then I'm there.
3. I love having a giant dog.
4. I love pilates because I like being able to rest and meditate while I exercise. It's like killing 2 birds with one stone.
5. I often get sad thinking about how my kids will some day grow up and move away.
6. I sometimes get excited thinking about how my kids will some day grow up and move away.
7. I almost never cry. My husband still brings up to me the time that I cried when we first got married because he wanted to leave me to go play basketball. That was 11 years ago. He's had nothing on me since.
8. I am so accustomed to having kids that when I am alone and I turn on the television my first instinct is to leave it on the first cartoon that I come too.
9. I mentally and physically can not be in the house if the outside temperature is between 60 and 80 degrees.
10. I check my email way too often.
11. I did a sprint triathlon in September and didn't come in last.
12. I give up sweets every year on Ash Wednesday for 6 weeks for non-religious reasons.
13. When I was 16 I was the honored queen in Jobs Daughters.
14. I am pulmonarily challenged. (I made that word up.)
15. As soon as I have a birthday I start thinking of myself as how old I'll be on my next birthday. I am 37 now so I consider myself 38. I don't know why. Maybe it's just to prepare myself mentally for getting older.
16. A few weeks ago as I was putting my kids to bed, all 4 of them were calling my name at the same time. For the first time I felt a wave of panic that maybe I was in over my head. It's never happened before and hasn't happened since.
17. I served a church mission in Brazil and can speak Portuguese.
18. When I was pregnant I never got sick but loved the smell of comet and wet dirt.
19. Before I had my first child I taught 6th grade social studies.
20. I have almost no sense of smell therefore I can't taste things as well as I should. John gave me a taste test using chocolate, vanilla and strawberry Breyers ice cream yesterday and I answered wrong every time.
21. I hate getting my kids up and getting them ready for and to school every day. Let's see. I have 6 years down and only about 19 years to go.
22. Sometimes I go into fits of laughter where I can't stop and tears will stream down my face. That probably makes up for #7.
23. I am extremely hopeful and optimistic and will always look for a silver lining rather than dwell on the negative.
24. My husband and I were MFEO.
25. I force my children to learn piano even though I never did.

Random Quotes

Sydney: "When I grow up I want to be a vet. But not a veterinarian because I want to be able to take care of animals but be able to eat them too."

Brooklyn: "Remember the Junie B. Jones ride we went on at Disneyland?" (referring to Indiana Jones)

RV 101

Though I enjoy going to California to visit my family it becomes more and more difficult to make the long drive. The first day of the drive, everyone does okay. By the second day the novelty has worn off a little but we're not yet completely miserable. Really it's the drive back that kills us. By then everyone is at the end of their ropes and in no mood to be cooped up in a mini van with each other for 20 hours. This year we knew we could no longer put it off and a visit to Bakersfield for Christmas was imminent. Again, I enjoy being there, I just don't enjoy the trip so the anticipation was bittersweet. Just days before the long journey we decided to go the adventurous route and rent an RV. Not just any RV but the monster of all RVs. A 34 footer. After deciding this the drive no longer filled me with dread. Anxiety, yes. Dread, no. The lesser of two evils I suppose. We ended up having a great time but I did learn a few valuable lessons on the trip that I wanted to record for future reference and also share with anyone out there who might be considering an RV trip in the near or distant future.

Lesson #1 So You've Decided To Go RVing
The first thing you should know about renting an RV is that pets are generally not allowed. Make sure you find a suitable place for your pet to stay while you are away. For example Golden Retrievers and pet bunny rabbits DO NOT mix. If the people you are considering leaving your Golden Retriever with happen to have a bunny rabbit it is important to note that Golden Retrievers are hunting dogs and it WILL EAT the bunny rabbit, making it an awkward homecoming along with the possibility of you having to uproot your family and move far, far away for embarassment sake.

Lesson #2 Road Safety
While RVs are easy enough to drive down the road, backing up is an entirely different story. It is important to note that your RV is quite tall. Just because you can't see anything directly behind you doesn't mean that there is not a tree branch furtively swooping down ready to smash in the back ladder. In the unlikely event that this should happen to you, don't worry, the RV that you are in is so massive that you will not feel a thing and probably won't even know that it happened until you are filling up with gas.

Lesson #3 Where Should I Park My RV?
Most novice RVers usually make plans to park in what is known as an RV park. We made this common error twice on our trip and then it became clear that we should pull over anywhere we darn well pleased and go to bed. Truly, any Costco parking lot or residential street will do.

Lesson #4 What Should I Do If People Start Referring To Me As Cousin Eddie?
This is completely normal and should come to be expected by any RVer traveling over Christmas break.

Lesson #5 You And Your Refundable Rental Deposit
It is a common misunderstanding that most people plan on getting most of this deposit back. In reality, no one ever gets their deposit back so before you leave on your trip make sure that you kiss it goodbye.

Lesson #6 Traveling Through Wyoming
Any wise RVer knows that Wyoming weather is extremely windy and what I like to refer to as "undesirable". If you should make the mistake of driving through, your awning will fall off. This is a very important lesson that some RVers tend to forget after experiencing it the first time just 10 years prior.

Lesson #7 Mechanical Failure Troubleshooting
The only mechanical feature on the RV that you need worry about breaking would be the stairs that pop out automatically when you open the door and likewise close when you close the door. You needn't worry too much about this because they won't break until you drive it up to your house at the very end of your trip. No harm done. All it means is that you now have a 3rd deductible to pay.

Lesson #8 What Should I Do If My Husband Inadvertently Locks Me In The Back Room?
Standard protocol states that you should be calm at first, waiting patiently for your husband to hear you knocking on the door despite the fact that he is driving down the interstate or for your children to wake up from their slumbers and rescue you. When this does not happen step 2 would be to lay back down on your bed and try to go back to sleep. When you find that your bladder simply will not stand for this it is now time to start panicking a little and banging on the door a little louder. Obviously, this is not going to help so now is the time to become a little hysterical. Only on the inside however because it wouldn't due to express hysteria when there is no one there to witness it. After hysteria sets in, try laying back down on the bed and staring at the ceiling as though you are in lock down in some mental institution. Of course, this will also do you no good at all so now is the time to let desperation creep in. By so doing, it will cause you to open the back window and pound on the side of the RV reaching your hand out the window as far as it will go and flailing it around as one final attempt at freedom. If this does not work the first time, keep trying until your loving husband hears a quiet banging and happens to glance out his rear view mirror. I assure you, it will bring you great relief to finally feel the RV start to slow down and pull over. When your husband opens the door say to him, "What is this? Your torture chamber?" And all will be well that ends well. Let's review those steps again:
Step 1. Patience
Step 2. Panic
Step 3. Hysteria
Step 4. Desperation
Step 5. Question

Lesson #9 Dumping Your Sewer
Dumping your sewer is never a fun job but if you are lucky you will find someone out in Utah who lets you dump it for free. There's nothing to it, really. Just make sure that the hoses are attached properly and you're set to go. Of course, since the ground is frozen the sewage will have no where to go but on top of the snow. However, you should feel good about this because at least you didn't dump it into the sidewalk sewer at your dad's house like Cousin Eddie would have done.

Lesson #10 Have Fun
The most important thing to remember is to have fun. This, you will not be able to avoid. You will be making many precious family memories on you RV adventure and it is a lifetime experience that you will never forget.  Just make sure you bring your camera and a journal so you can record all those events that some day you are bound to look back and laugh at.

One Final Note

If upon your return you should decide that despite the fun you had on your journey RVing is really not for you, don't be surprised when you win a free 4 day rental for the spring in a Christmas drawing you did not even know you had entered.  Happy RVing!

Christmas 2008

I like to write blogs as a stress relief.  And this Christmas season has been extremely stressful for me.  (Come on blog, work your healing magic.)   I have no one to blame but myself for this.  Our lives are really only as stressful as we make them, or let them be.  I made my life stressful but not because I like stress.  Then, "why?" you may ask.  I'll tell you.  I do it in the hopes that when I die, my kids will remember me for all those gingerbread houses I made for them and their friends instead of the homework nag that I am.  I do it so that instead of remembering me as the "Piano Nazi" (which I like to call myself) they'll remember all those great gifts I made them by hand for Christmas.  Instead of remembering me as the bedroom cleaning oppressor, maybe they'll remember me as the great mom who threw each of them their own individual Christmas parties out of the kindness of my heart.  Maybe they'll remember the trip to California/Disneyland over all those times I woke them up early and forced them out of bed to get ready for school.   And maybe, just maybe, Bryton will remember how I pulled him out of school and took him to a matinee and Sydney, Brooklyn and Whitney will remember how I dressed them all up and brought them to see the Nutcracker instead of how I was always telling them to get off the computer and turn off the television.  And why does writing this blog make me feel better?  Because I know that if I should die tomorrow, eventually my kids will read this out of curiosity and be forced to remember all my "cool momisms".  Thus I shall have one last chance to oppress them.

-The Dictator